I dreamt that I was sitting on airplane next to James Franco. I told him I thought his film version of The Sound and the Fury was underrated. He smiled shyly and said, “I’m glad you liked it.”
Last night, I dreamed that I was a teenager in high school again. I was at my house (and, in the dream, it was even the house where we lived when I was in high school) and all of my friends from the drama club were there. We were talking about putting on a play that I had written. Some of them were upset that I was not only the writer and the director but that I had given myself the lead role as well. They kept complaining that I had given all of the good lines to myself.
“Well,” I said, “if you want a good line, write your own damn play.”
Mostly to shut them up, I then turned on the TV. Simon Cowell appeared on the screen, singing the Saved By The Bell theme song. However, this was the extended version of the song, which meant it had verses that we had never heard before.
At one point, Simon sang, “We all know gwam means lame/I’m saved by the bell….”
My friends and I looked at each other and said, “Gwam?”
On the TV, Simon repeated, “We all know gwam means lame/ I’m saved by the bell….”
“This is going in the play,” I said.
And that’s when I woke up.
(Disclaimer: I do not know Ben Affleck. I have never met Ben Affleck. My commentary on the behavior of Dream Ben Affleck should not be taken as any sort of commentary on the behavior of real-life Ben Affleck)
After a month-long hiatus, I am happy to return to my online dream journal with a weird dream about Ben Affleck.
Now, as often happens with dreams, I can’t remember all of the details. But here’s what I can tell you:
In my dream, I was once again in high school. This is actually kind of a reoccurring theme in my dreams, though usually I find myself back in college. What was unique this time is that I wasn’t an adult back in high school. Instead, I was a teenager again.
My friends and I were attending some sort of weekend, educational retreat that was being held in this small town that sat high atop a snow-covered mountain. As soon as we arrived, I noticed that Ben Affleck was following our group around. I asked one of my friends why Ben Affleck was following us around and she said she didn’t know but that he was everyone’s friend.
Anyway, as the weekend progressed, my classmates and I went to various classes that were held across town. Ben Affleck tagged along with us. Then, one day, I noticed that Ben was no longer with us. I asked where he was and I was told that Ben had been arrested for unpaid speeding tickets and was sitting in jail. So, I called up a lawyer and I asked him if he could come to the town and get Ben out of jail. The lawyer agreed.
My friends and I were all standing outside the police station, waiting for Ben to get out of jail. When Ben finally exited the police station, we all cheered but Ben ignored all of us and walked away without saying a word.
“You know,” I yelled, “I got you an attorney! A thank you would be nice!”
And that’s when I woke up.
Last night, I dreamt that both Naomi Watts and Nicole Kidman were coming over for a visit so, naturally, I had to clean the house. Unfortunately, it seemed that the more I cleaned, the messier the house got. I was working on mopping the kitchen floor when I happened to glance out the backyard and discovered that it had been invaded by a pack of feral cats, none of whom looked like they were planning on leaving.
I can’t remember if, during the dream, Nicole and Naomi ever arrived. I just hope that, if they did, I had the house clean.
Last night, I dreamt that my Dad had gotten remarried and my new stepmom was Angelina Jolie. I was upset because 1) Angelina borrowed my laptop so she could write a book and then she never returned it, 2) she seemed disinterested whenever I tried to talk to her about my own writing ambitions, and 3) she just didn’t seem to like me much.